Harriet Miers: The Cover Your Ass Theory

It may be that Harriet Miers is a born again Christian who opposes same sex marriage and will vote to overturn Roe v. Wade and will ultimately satisfy the fringe right, but that’s not why Bush nominated her to sit on the Supreme Court. She is the “Ace in the Hole”, the “back up plan”, the “cover your ass” nominee.

While the blogisphere is abuzz with the impending Plamegate indictments, and the 24/7 (used to be)news channels are busy pumping out the regular fluff that fills our collective head like Candy Floss in the parade of crap news, Bush sits it wait hoping that Miers gets through before the indictments do. If he can just get her on the court, if he can just make sure that she’s the deciding vote on the shit storm that is about to hit, he’ll be okay.

I don’t think for a second that Bush is running anything for real, but I do believe that he believes his little toy steering wheel is driving the car. What he understands of the presidency is what my nine-year old daughter does. That it’s a powerful job that kids will be reading about one day. It’s like the kid who wants to be a rock star, but gives no thought at all to being a musician. The difference between Tommy Lee and John Lennon, is akin to the difference between (I’ll be fair here) Dwight D. Eisenhower and George W. Bush. Sure there are other motivations beyond making the world a better place, but it should be about more than having your name in a print and having girls think you’re cool.

If Bush can get good ol’ Harriet on the Supreme Court, his crimes will never be fully realized and surely never fully accounted for. It’s like Tommy Lee having the president of his fan club as the foreperson in his spousal abuse case. Both stories end the same, the bad boy doesn’t have to go to rehab, he just keeps on abusing. At least Tommy only hit his wife, Georgie beat the shit out of all of us and he will get away with it if Harriet gets confirmed. She is not the long awaited for payback for the stampede to the polls by the religious extremists; she is the lovesick schoolgirl who will erase his crimes. Bush may not know a lot about how government works (we all saw the disaster within a disaster that was the federal response to hurricane Katrina), but he knows how to get the ugly girl to vote him homecoming king. Just smile your rich boy smile and intimate that there’s more where that came from. Too bad it doesn’t work on the Senate (with the exception of Kay Bailey Hutchison, of course, who may soon be joined by Katherine Harris, but that’s a post for another time).