Channeling My Inner Rove

I have to give credit to Yellow Dog for the seed he planted in my fertile brain with his post, “Help Me Develop This”, in which he proposes that the DNC help finance a moderate-conservative candidate to split the Republican vote. While I like the sneaky nature of such a move, I don’t think it’s quite sinister enough so I’ve come up with an idea of my own.

How about we promote the real wingnuts instead. While there have been some interesting developments within the Evangelical community, reaching out to traditional liberals and making common cause on the environment and seeking legal and reasonable solutions to religion in public schools, it seems that many on the fringe right think that this administration hasn’t done enough to promote their religious/political agenda. I know, I had to re-read it a few times myself to make sure I wasn’t crazy, but many Evangelicals, including Tony Perkins of The Family Research Council, think the President has let them down by not pushing harder to ban same sex marriage. I say, if there is a crack developing within the Evangelical community, we should do all we can to help facilitate a further drift. Continue making common cause with reasonable Evangelicals that share our concerns and are interested in realistic solutions, but peel off the fringe right and channel their energy in a more futile direction. Here is my humble suggestion for how we go about it.

Track down the most right-wing, homophobic, anti-choice, bible thumping candidate in your district or state, start going to meetings, rallies, whatever and start planting the seed that if this candidate doesn’t get the Republican nomination, he/she should run as a third party candidate. Write up “draft (Wingnut’s name here)” petitions and get the base real excited about the idea. Then, us bloggers will back you up. How, you ask? By starting shadow blogs that cater to your new fanatic friends and provide them with an opportunity to give money, volunteer time and spread the news to all of their friends and neighbors with an easy click of the mouse. Sure, it will be hard to write the kind of vile, hateful and bigoted posts that will appeal to this group most, but I even have an answer for that.

If we write all of our posts as satire, we can sleep at night knowing that we are not advocating homophobia or promoting ideas we abhor, but rather exposing hypocrisy and providing useful social commentary to boot. And the best part is, the crazies will never know. Most of them likely can’t recognize satire at all and if they can, certainly not when it comes to their own extreme views. What we would consider satire, they would consider sound political ideas. I don’t know about you, but I’m thinking maybe we have winner here. I know it’s what Rove would do.


Editors note: If you are a right-wing nut and you are so angry right now that you can hardly see straight, before you send me an email, let me point out one small thing. This is satire and you just proved my point.